


Another Kind of Strength

by WhirlwindWolf94



Series: Hogwarts Mystery [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Female Player Character (Hogwarts Mystery), Hopefully accurate depiction of panic attacks, Panic Attacks, Video Game: Harry Potter: Hogwarts Mystery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-27
Updated: 2019-02-27
Packaged: 2019-11-06 12:04:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17939351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhirlwindWolf94/pseuds/WhirlwindWolf94
Summary: This is a random idea I had during a bout of insomnia. I do not suffer from panic attacks myself, but have known others who do. My best friend's little brother being one of them. But I just had a random thought like; "Man, the MC of the Hogwarts Mystery game has already been through a lot. They must be affected by it somehow. What if the stress of it all just finally breaks them?" Yeah I have dark thoughts when I can't sleep. But my favorite strong boy Barnaby is there to help! Because seeing Voldemort as a small child must've done something at the time. C'mon. And I am terrible at summaries, so I'll wrap this up now. Enjoy! And feel free to correct me about symptoms and treatments for panic attacks in the comments. I am totally open to constructive criticism.Also, the MC here is based on my own. I named her Winter Tepes. Just in case that's confusing.





	Another Kind of Strength

**A Hogwarts Mystery Fanfic**

 

 

 

_**Barnaby** _

  
I may not be the smartest student at Hogwarts, but I know when my friends need help.

  
Since I met her, Winter Tepes has been really friendly to me. She's so nice to everyone, or tries to be, anyway. Becoming a prefect kinda makes it hard for her to be sweet all the time, she has to put her foot down a lot. And she can be scary for a Gryffindor! That one first year she caught sticking dung bombs in Snape's cauldron between classes looked so terrified after a scolding, I thought he would mess his trousers.

  
But there is one thing I've noticed about her. Every now and then, she'll excuse herself to the bathroom just out of the blue. That wouldn't be strange if she hadn't already gone twenty minutes before. And when she gets back from those sudden trips, I always see her hair is slightly out of place. And that should be raising red flags for everyone else, too. She is so persnickety about her hair, it's borderline insane. But nobody else ever said anything about it, not even Rowan, Ben, or Tonks, so I've brushed it off. Until now, that is.

  
It's early morning and we have the worst class for mornings. Potions. The smells of the brewing cauldrons always woke us up, but never in a good way. Besides, Winter's been acting strange. She didn't eat anything at breakfast. Which isn't out of the ordinary, she hardly ever eats breakfast, she usually just has a cup of coffee. But this morning, she didn't even have that. Just kept trying to make everyone believe she was fighting off sleep. But I was right next to her and saw her flexing her hands under the table. She would ball her hands into fists so tight, her knuckles turned white. And they were shaky. I would've asked her about it, but by the time I noticed, it was time for class. No chance to focus on her there with Snape breathing down our necks. I didn't even remember what potion we were supposed to be making.

  
"Ugh. Tepes, you're breathing like a dog after a run, what's wrong with you?" Merula asked, annoyed.

  
"I'm fine." Winter said, her voice barely louder than a whisper.

  
My head snapped up in an instant. I finally got a good look at her and it wasn't good. Well, she's always pretty, but she looked ill. She was staring at her cauldron like it was blurry. But she was wearing her glasses. And she was breathing fast, but they were shallow. Her hand was clutching her robes, right over her chest. And she was shaking. And I mean shaking like a bowtruckle caught in a strong breeze. The blue in her eyes was completely swallowed in black, and they were widening like she was seeing something terrifying. Y'know the worst part about all this? I knew exactly what this was.

  
"Professor!" I called, waving the man over.

  
"What is it, Mr. Lee? You had better not have swallowed another botched potion." Snape snarled as he reached our table.

  
"No sir. It's Winter, she needs to go to the hospital wing. Now." I said, looking him dead in the eye.

  
"And why is that, Mr. Lee?"

  
"Look at her, Professor! She's having a panic attack!"

  
He raised an eyebrow as he glanced in Winter's direction. When he caught sight of her nearly doubled over at the table, he finally snapped to attention. Seriously, his bias against Gryffindor is gonna kill someone one day. I hopped off my chair and rushed over to Winter's side as Snape got a good look at her.

  
"Miss Tepes. Can you hear me?" Snape asked, placing a hand on her shoulder. She flinched.

  
"Yes sir." her voice was still quiet.

  
"Are you alright?"

  
"Professor! She's not gonna say yes! Winter, do you wanna go to the hospital wing? Or maybe the courtyard? The owlets should be learning to fly 'bout now, you wanna watch?" I asked, rubbing circles in the space between her shoulder blades.

  
"Courtyard. Please." she said, letting me help her off her chair.

  
"Okay, we'll go to the courtyard. C'mon, I'm sure Rowan will bring your bag after class, right?" I asked, looking at Winter's best friend.

  
"Of course! I'll take care of it. Go watch the owlets!" Rowan said, patting Winter's shoulder.

  
"See? C'mon, let's go. Professor, could you let Madam Pomfrey know what's happened?"

  
"Yes. Now go before I deduct points, Mr. Lee."

  
With that, I started gently guiding Winter out of the classroom. She was leaning on me, too, which was really bad since she goes out of her way to avoid doing that. She was still breathing wrong, she wasn't taking full breaths.

  
"Hey, Winter, it's okay. You're not in any kind of danger. You're alright, you can breathe. Just breathe, okay? Four seconds in, four seconds out. Can you do that for me? Please?" I asked, still rubbing at her back. We were almost at the courtyard.

  
She finally took a full breath. Thank Merlin for that. We don't need her passing out while having a panic attack. We finally got to the courtyard and I gently sat her down at the fountain. She immediately doubled over and clapped her hands to the sides of her head. She started rocking back and forth, her breathing going bad again.

  
"Hey, hey, Winter! C'mon, breathe. Breathe for me, please! Four seconds in, four out, okay? That was the deal, can you please do that for me? Please!" I said, still rubbing her back.

  
She took a deep breath. But the exhale came with a panicked whimper that I knew very well.

  
"Hey, c'mon. There's nobody here. Look around, go on. We're the only ones here. Nobody is going to hurt you. And if anyone tries, I'm here to beat them to a pulp. I will take on anyone who tries to hurt you, alright? I am here with you, okay? There is no way anyone is going to hurt you. Not while I'm here. Okay? It's alright. This will all be over soon and you'll feel loads better. Just keep breathing and it will all be over before you know it. Hey! Hey, look up there! The little owlets are getting ready to fly! Look, Winter, look!"

  
She looked up toward the clocktower, where we knew a nest of owlets had been set up months ago. We had been following the progress of those little guys since they hatched. They've shed their baby down and finally grown out their feathers. We knew it was going to happen soon, so we were disappointed when we saw we had potions that morning. Hopefully, this will be enough to bring her back from whatever was going on in her head. It's always worked for me.

  
And she gasped. As soon as the first owlet spread it's wings, Winter gasped and finally let her robes out of that death grip she had them in. It really was a sight to see, the little babies taking wing for the first time. And take wing they did. The fourth one stumbled a little, making Winter clutch at my knee for a moment. But then the little one was soaring behind it's siblings like it was born for it. . . Which it was, come to think of it. As soon as the owlets were out of sight, I felt Winter slump against my side. She was breathing normally again.

  
"Hey. You okay?" I asked, giving her shoulders a squeeze.

  
"I am now. Thank you, Barnaby. I don't know where that came from." she said, sitting up straight.

  
"Yeah you do. But I'm not gonna make you tell me. That can wait. Headache?"

  
"A little one. How'd you know what to do?"

  
"I used to get those all the time when I was little. Kinda came with the territory when you were a Death Eaters' kid. Didn't really help when I was alone, passed out more times than I can count. They're serious problems at times. It wasn't until my uncle Cecil took over takin' care of me that I got any help with them. And when I was finally allowed to have pets and take care of them, the panic attacks stopped. Had a close call third year when Ismelda hit me with that spell, but all I had to do was take a few deep breaths until I could get to the hospital wing. And then Madam Pomfrey took care of me until I came down from it. S'long as you're not alone during them, panic attacks can come and go before you know it. I'm just glad you showed signs before you fell face-first into your cauldron."

  
"You had panic attacks?"

  
"Yeah. You haven't seen You-Know-Who in the flesh without it being a boggart. That's enough to strike fear in anyone's heart, let alone a small child's."

  
"You had to be alone? I can't imagine that. My dad broke an inkwell getting to me when I had my first one."

  
"And when was that?"

  
"Sounds lame, but it was right after Jacob left for Hogwarts for the first time. I was almost five at the time and he was my best friend. My only friend other than Artemis."

  
"Your kneazle?"

  
"Yeah. I was always a strange kid, not many other children wanted to play with me. So I made animal friends. And Jacob. And when he was gone, I just couldn't cope with having that one lifeline gone just like that."

  
"Lifeline?"

  
"Kinda dramatic, but I was an extremely shy child. Mum would take me to the shops for clothes and food, but I'd just cling to her robes and try not to look at anyone. And if anyone spoke to me, I'd make this pathetic little squeak sound and hide behind my mum. But when Jacob was with me, I could talk to everyone. Because he was my big brother, he could protect me and he knew who to trust and who to stay away from. He helped me get better, but for the longest time, I couldn't function properly without him."

  
"And then he was gone."

  
"Yeah. Dad took me to the bookshop to get me a new sketchbook the day after Jacob left. And he left me alone for just a minute to talk to the clerk. One minute was all it took for everything to collapse around me."

  
"Wow. That's why you're so protective of your brother's name. I get it now. He sounds like a great person, really. Hey, you're gonna be alright. You know that, right? You've got friends here who adore you. Merlin's beard, do you think we'd put up with this Cursed Vault bollocks if we didn't? I mean that in a good way! I swear I didn't mean that in any sort of bad way!"

  
She chuckled. For the first time in two weeks, she chuckled. To an outsider, even to me before she enlisted me into her circle of friends, that chuckle could sound dark and menacing. But those in the know. . . er. . . know that her chuckle is anything but. She took a deep breath and leaned against my shoulder again. Wow, she was exhausted. I thought her eyes were a little dark.

  
"Thank you, Bee." she said, her voice softer and more relaxed.

  
"'Bee'?" I asked, tilting my head a little to get a look at her.

  
"Yeah. A little nickname. I won't use it if you don't like it, though."

  
"Nah, I like it. Bees are tough, right? They hurt when they sting you."

  
"Yeah. And they'd kill me. I'm allergic."

  
"Well, then I'll fight 'em all off for you! Or give you enough cover to get out of there, anyway."

  
"I'm sure you would. Thanks, Bee."

  
"You're welcome. But for what?"

  
"For being you."

  
"Huh?"

  
. . .

  
. . .

  
. . .

  
"Winter?"

  
Oh. She dozed off. Just in time, too.

  
"Hi Madam Pomfrey." I said, seeing the nurse rushing over to us.

  
"Goodness! Mr. Lee, is she alright? With all the students coming down with the flu this season, I almost missed Professor Snape's owl. What happened?" Madam Pomfrey asked, gently brushing Winter's hair out of her face to get a look at her.

  
"Panic attack. I think she's been having them for the past few weeks. I managed to get her through it, but I don't think she's sleeping well."

  
"Of course she's not! What, with all this Cursed Vault nonsense keeping her up at night! Come, dear, let's get her to the hospital wing. Can you carry her for me?"

  
"Yes, ma'am."

  
With that, I shifted Winter so I could carry her on my back. As soon as I had her settled, and with some help from Madam Pomfrey, we set off to the infirmary. Ha! I knew I could remember the other name for the hospital wing! It was still early, so I guess Winter's gonna have some serious catch-up work to do. But we'll help her. Even me! I don't know about the other classes, but I can definitely help with Care of Magical Creatures. Oh wow. There really are a lot of people out with the flu. There's only one bed left.

  
"Come now, set her down. I'll get her a potion when she wakes up." Madam Pomfrey said as I set Winter down on the bed.

  
"S'long as it's not the Draught of Peace. She hates that potion. Says nobody should be forced to feel better when they don't." I said, taking Winter's glasses off so they didn't break in her sleep.

  
"Don't worry, dear. I'll just give her something for her headache and some water. Then she'll be on her way. She's lucky, you know."

  
"How?"

  
"To have a friend like you. Your whole group is close as a pack of wolves, but you seem to be better at connecting with her. The poor dear needs it, especially after the incident with her brother. He was a sweet boy, really. I hope she gets the closure she needs from this mess."

  
"Me, too. We'll make sure she does. All of us."

  
"Good. Well, now, I've got her from here. You're free to go, Mr. Lee."

  
"Uh. . . Madam Pomfrey?"

  
"Yes, dear?"

  
"Would it be alright if I stayed here? Just until she wakes up? I could help you around with the other students, or with her, or anything you need. Just s'long as she doesn't wake up alone. Well, she won't be alone with you here and a dozen sick students in the other beds, but without a friend here. Not that you can't be a friend, Madam Pomfrey, but-"

  
"Easy, dearie. You can stay. Just until she wakes up. I'll send word to your teachers, alright? Now, if you would please get that cauldron over there full of water and washcloths and get it heating up for me, I can get to work on these poor flu-ridden students."

  
"Thank you, Madam!"

  
With that, I filled the cauldron with water, dumped the washcloths in, and lit the fire beneath it. As I was stirring, I kept thinking about what I could do to keep this from happening again. Or, if it did happen again, how to teach the others what to do. I can't be with her for every class. I don't have Charms, Transfiguration, or Herbology with her. That's it! As soon as Winter wakes up and we all have some free time, we're all having a study session in the library. Not just for Winter alone, but anyone they see suffering from panic attacks. How to identify it and how to help the person through them. Huh. Starting to sound like Rowan now. Guess all the other study sessions are paying off.

  
With a smile, I set about doing what Madam Pomfrey told me to do. All while knowing that I came up with a way to help my friend all on my own. And really do believe that it's going to work.


End file.
